As many times as I felt myself trying to claw my way out
there was always your face and the way you held me, even briefly, when I absolutely couldn't stand anymore
and the drive through zoo
and eureka springs
and everything
and everything
I think people have gotten through things like this before
but I always thought we were different
and I wonder what the jagged, keloid scars look like on their hearts and how often they have to grab their chests and catch their breath
damn our pasts for making us weak
now in the mirror my face is a smear
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